Takeaways from Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg

 

Three of my main takeaways from the book:

  • Gender equality empowers men too.

Let´s change the expectation that it´s natural for men to be less involved in the family or in raising the kids. Men should be given the equal chance to bond with family without being pressured by society or be seen as “weak” if they do.

  • Let your partner be a real partner.

In the home and, might I add, outside of the home as well.

  • Women need to stop “maternal gatekeeping” to allow their partners to be real partners.

“As women must be more empowered at work, men must be more empowered at home. I have seen so many women inadvertently discourage their husbands from doing their share by being too controlling or critical. Social scientists call this ‘maternal gatekeeping,’ which is a fancy term for ‘Ohmigod, that´s not the way you do it! Just move aside and let me!’ When it comes to children, fathers often take their cues from mothers. This gives a mother great power to encourage of impede the father´s involvement. If she acts as a gatekeeper mother and is reluctant to hand over responsibility, or worse, questions the father´s effors, he does less.”

“Now we know that women can do what men can do, but we don´t know that men can do what women can do.”

Side takeaway on parenting and life in general:

  • Reflecting someone´s viewpoint becomes a starting point for resolution.

“When we had arguments, our mother taught us – or more like forced us – to mirror each other, which means restating the other person´s point before responding to it. For example, one day my sister and I were fighting over a lollipop. ‘Sheryl ate the last lollipop!’ Michelle screamed. ‘But she had a lollipop yesterday and I didn´t!’ I screamed back, making an excellent point. My mother sat us down facing each other. I was not allowed to explain how gravely inequitable the lollipop allocation was until I acknowleged my sister´s feelings. ‘Michelle, I understand that you are upset because I ate the last lollipop and you wanted it.’ As painful as this was at the time, reflecting someone else´s viewpoint clarifies the disagreement and becomes a starting point for resolution. We all want to be heard, and when we focus on showing others that we are listening, we actually become better listeners.”

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What do YOU do on a Saturday?

Ever seen a brawl go down? I’ve never quite seen one myself, but judging from kung fu movies it gets pretty scary when your leader gets defeated.

I mean imagine. You’re in the heat of a fight, punches flaying, heart pounding, and oh dear, was that the sound of bones cracking somewhere to your right?

And then you realize your leader, the Alpha Male, the strongest and bravest of your pack, has fallen. What do you do?

You run.

Honestly, I’m surprised that’s what the disciples didn’t do when Jesus was crucified. I mean, they just crucified your leader, wouldn’t you be afraid you were next?

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I wonder why the disciples stayed. Perhaps they were just so lost, they didn’t know where to go. Perhaps they were still processing that those past few eventful years of their lives with Jesus… That it was all a lie. How could it be a lie? It had to be, Jesus was dead. How could that be? It all happened so fast… Was that what they were thinking?

Perhaps there was a logical reason. Perhaps they were staying around to watch over Jesus’ mother, or family, or something. Or perhaps, just perhaps, it was just because they truly loved Jesus.

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Did the disciples understand what Jesus was doing?

No. John 2:9 tells us that they did not understand that Jesus had to rise from the dead. For all they knew, Jesus was game over. Finitto. Kaput.

Does this sound like any moment in your life?

As Max Lucado put it in his book Cast of Characters, “John did not know on that Friday what you and I now know. He didn’t know that Friday’s tragedy would be Sunday’s triumph… That’s why what he did on Saturday is so important.” But because he chose to stay on the Saturday, he was able to share in the joy of Sunday’s miracle. (John 20)

Lord, I pray for my brothers, my sisters and myself that we would be faithful to You on Saturday even though we may not know when Sunday is coming. We believe Lord, help us with our unbelief! Help us when the doubts irritate, or even scream for our attention. And as always Lord Jesus, thank You for Your grace toward us even when we fail. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Favorite Excerpts – Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

“I see. It’s nice to have accomplishments and be elegant, but not to show off or get perked up,” said Amy thoughtfully.

“These things are always seen and felt in a person’s manner and conversations, if modestly used, but it is not necessary to display them,” said Mrs. March.

“Any more than it’s proper to wear all your bonnets and gowns and ribbons at once, that folks may know you’ve got them,” added Jo, and the lecture ended in a laugh.

 

“Mercy on us, this will never do,” thought Jo; adding aloud, “Go and sing for me. I’m dying for some music, and ‘always like yours.'”

“I’d rather stay here, thank you.”

“Well, you can’t; there isn’t room. Go and make yourself useful, since you are too big to be ornamental…”

 

“Little Teddy bore a charmed life, for nothing ever happened to him, and Jo never felt any anxiety when he was whisked up into a tree by one lad, galloped off on the back of another, or supplied with sour russets by his indulgent papa, who labored under the Germanic delusion that babies could digest anything, from pickled cabbage to buttons, nails, and their own small shoes. She knew that little Ted would turn up again in time, safe and rosy, dirty and serene, and she always received him back with a hearty welcome, for Jo loved her babies tenderly.”

 

 

Quote

From Hansi: the Girl Who Loved the Swastika

Technically not a quote, but this is my favorite portion from the book. 🙂

The teachers in the audience smiled. The American guest speaker seemed a bit uneasy. “The reason for that is that I tried not to hurt your feelings. It has been only such a short time since you all taught under Hitler; I fully understand if you still feel very much as you did during Nazi times — it will take time to reorient your thinking toward democratic principles.” I found myself standing and my heart was throbbing in my throat, but I had to answer him. “Sir,” I said, and took a deep breath, “If you try to indicate that we are still Nazis, you are wrong. We are not Nazis nor anything else. We trusted once and paid with our heartblood for it. We got hurt, sir, and we are still hurting, and we are not willing to trust again — neither democracy nor any other system. So it isn’t that we are against what you said; it just sounds too good to be true, at least for us, for we are like burnt children who are afraid of fire.”

Favorite: Richard III

Murderer I and II are about to murder Clarence, King Edward’s brother. Murderer II is suddenly stricken by guilt.

FIRST MURDERER
Remember our reward when the deed’s done.

SECOND MURDERER
Zounds, he dies! I had forgot the reward.

FIRST MURDERER
Where’s thy conscience now?

SECOND MURDERER
O, in the duke of Gloucester’s purse.

FIRST MURDERER
So when he opens his purse to give us our reward, thy conscience flies out.

XD OMG Shakespeare is HILARIOUS! I love his work.

Fave quotes from A Tale of Two Cities

“What is your magic secret, my darling, of your being everything to all of us, as if there were only one of us, yet never seeming to be hurried, or to have too much to do?”

uttered to Lucie, who weaves the invisible golden thread that holds her husband and child, father and lifelong friends together.

“I look only to sharing your fortunes, sharing your life and home, and being faithful to you to the death.
Not to divide with Lucie her privilege as your child, companion and friend;
but to come in aid of it, and bind her closer to you, if such a thing can be.”

said of Darnay to the father of his bride-to-be.

p/s. Tale of Two Cities just got to my top 2 favorite books.

The Bride Wore White – Purity is a Process

Psalm 51:5

Surely I was sinful at birth,
    sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

Ecclesiastes 7:20

There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins.

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We are not born pure and innocent. We are born with our sinful nature.

We do not lose that purity along the way. We learn to be pure after we have given our lives to Christ.

For what is the worldly motivation to be pure? Because it is tradition? Because society looks down on being “impure”? What if society changed their expectations on you? What if tradition wasn’t to lead a pure life?

We desire to be pure because it is what God calls us to. He has placed His desire in us, and we desire to please Him.

Freeing truth, huh? 🙂

This is gonna be a journey to purity, so hang in there sisters. (and brothers I guess if you’re reading! :D)

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1 John 2:28

And now, dear children, continue in him, so that when he appears we may be confident and unashamed before him at his coming.

Prophecy for Today – 2) The Next Event in the Prophetic Program

For the believer, the next event is the rapture of the church.

1) 1 Corinthians 15:51. 

51 Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed — 52 in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed.

– it was already known previously that Christ would return and bring His people unto Himself, but the process of which the believers knew that it was going to happen was:

death > resurrection > brought to be with the Lord

so the mystery that was revealed was that not everyone had to die before they were brought to be with the Lord.

2) Paul gave more details about this rapture because a problem had occurred in the Thessalonian assembly: some of the members of the assembly had died and they were afraid that those who had died would have an inferior place to those who were taken up alive. 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18.

13 Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. 14 For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.15 According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. 16 For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first17 After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. 18 Therefore encourage one another with these words.

3) We should not look at the rapture as a translation to a place,

but a meeting up with a Person.

1 John 14:1-3

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God[a]; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.

Prophecy for Today – 1) Why Study Prophecy?

1. To reveal the authority and reliability of the Word. The test of prophecy is its fulfillment.

2. Reveals God’s power and wisdom. (Isaiah 7. God gave a sign to Ahaz)

3. Prophecy reveals the purposes of God. (Genesis 18:7. “Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do; seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?”)

4. Peace to believers. Knowing things we see happening are part of God’s plan.

5. To produce holy lives in God’s children. Each reference in the New Testament about the coming of Christ is followed by an exhortation to godliness and holy living.